Finnegan is a Tourist. He's no real idea of why he's in the dungeons of doom, but he's eager to find the elusive Succubus he's head so much about. A lady of beauty so tempting that one would risk eternal damnation to lie with her, so sensous people have been torn apart while enjoying their infinite lust? Finnegan must find her.
Finnegan is kind of dumb. With a 15 int and 8 wisdom he's able to figure out how most things work, but often finds himself wandering around the same winding paths in new towns, desperately hoping to stumble on a bathroom or someplace to calm his ravenous appetite.
I have no idea why I decided to come down here, and why they said if I left it was for good, but when I asked everyone I always got the same answer: "If you leave, it's over, you'll never find the entrance again."
I don't know why that is, but there looks to be fountains down here, and it's been nearly an hour since I've had a drink of any kind, and I'm so thirsty.
Blech! It's like sewage! Or maybe it's like bad scotch... I guess I'll take another sip, someone said that sometimes good things happen when you drink from these horrible fountains.
That one wasn't so bad, I guess I could enjoy some tepid--um, "hi".
"Hello mortal! Prepare to be sundered in your most erogenous zones!" said the terrifying water demon, "HA! Gotcha, don't worry about me man, somehow I got trapped in there for the last 200 years, and I guess I'm a pretty cool dude so I'll give you anything you want."
"Give me a second to think, can you? I think I just peed a little."
"Sure but hurry up! I've been away for hundreds of years and I'm sure there is a lot waiting for me above these halls."
"I'll have a really nice saber? Somehow I only packed darts and they really haven't--"
"Enough! I know just the thing for you, take this, and if you see Rodney," with this he looked at me like I was a child holding a sword like a broom, which I guess I am a little, "then shove this up his bony ass, it'll make my day to know that you or, someone more fitting to the task, does it."
He disappeared, and I haven't heard from him since. I feel like I just got a big swing of luck, and I'm a little scared of this sword, I think I'll stick with my darts for now, although I don't think they'll cut it for long.
"Hey a Stick!"
WHAT DO YOU WISH FOR?
NOTHING LIKE THAT EXISTS, WHAT DO YOU WISH FOR?
"Really good armor?"
I just got armor? Does this work still? "Fetch!"
Dammit. I think I botched one. It asked me twice, in my head, I'm not sure my little pup knows anything even happened. I'll hang on to this for a while, and see what I can do about making it work again. I can't see why people are so scared of this place, the demons are pretty chill guys and sticks grant wishes down here. Maybe I'm not here at all and I'm dreaming--"OUCH"
"GET AWAY FROM ME NEWT GOD%^*($!"
Definately not a dream, guess I need to start looking around some more.